Love is a doing verb

Fearless on my breath.

Shes all I've thought about all day.

I asked Matt what he thought about her and I.

He told me that in reality, he wouldn't worry about me, but more about her dicking me over.

But he voiced a genuine support it seemed.

It scares me, the thought, but Im starting to think its gone too far to turn back now.

Theres not a doubt in my mind that I love that girl. Not a doubt.

Thursday sealed the deal. I know we look good together, ha.

I know I look at her differently than about any woman thats ever been in my life.

We look each other in the eyes when we speak.

I know there is something there.

But I can't let myself get my hopes up.

Honestly, Im not the man I used to be

I cant shrug it off if nothing happens.

This is eating me up.

It really is.

The anticipation of getting something Ive wanted for almost 4 years now.

Or knowing its going to be another heartbreak.

I just wonder how much sincerity was in the conversations we've shared over the weekend.